Just a regular day in the Lord household......
Our floors are sticky and littered with toys, the table is strewn with abandoned snacks, and there is always furniture that has been re-located for one reason or another. Our meals are unstructured and frequent. The dishes pile and pile until there is no longer counter space with which to make the next meal. Throw pillows rarely remain on the couch and instead are used as doors for tents. My children run wild both indoors and outdoors. They spend their days picking huckleberries, making mud, flower soup, and playing games that only 3-9 year old children could comprehend. They ride their bikes for hours without sunscreen or hats and only come indoors to inhale water and food. Most of the time they are half dressed or running naked through the sprinkler. Our "china cabinet" has become a "craft cupboard" and it is filled to brim with glitter, glue, paper and feathers.
We have fruit flies and regular flies and we rarely close our doors. Our entryway is littered with the shoes of the neighborhood children. We bellow and coerce and sometimes spank our children. We talk about death and domestic abuse and why there are bad people in the world. We let our children explore the meadow and the forest behind our home. One of their favorite places is the foundation of a home that burnt down a long time ago. Capturing dragon flies and snakes brings our children an insane amount of joy. More often than not, they have twigs in their hair and flowers in their fists. They are free and wild and creative. Their idea of an outing is foraging for berries. I think it is safe to say that my children are "free range".
I don't dress up much these days, or go out for that matter. My hair is in a perpetual knot on the top of my head. I fantasize about clean surfaces. "Me time" consists of a sweaty twenty minute workout or five uninterrupted minutes of surfing pinterest. It means that I am emotionally and physically spent at the end of my fourteen hour work shift only to nurse the youngest several times a night. It means that my shoulders are always coated with snot and that I stay up late just to enjoy solitude. I have learned that things and small humans never stay put, so it is better to let the house go to ruin rather than stressing about keeping it tidy. It means that I am no longer as punctual as I once prided myself in being. Just the other day Nathaniel and I had a discussion about our marriage "goals"and our unanimous answer was "survival". We joke about learning another language so that we can have a discussion in private. Our idea of a date is homemade popcorn, PVR and a quickie before we collapse into bed.
Sometimes I wonder if I am making the best parenting choices and if I should have them more in involved in "structured activities" but I figure that they will have the rest of their live for such things and that they can only be children for a small period of time. My children are not nearly as sheltered as I was growing up, but that is largely due to the fact that Nathaniel is their father.
Sometimes I feel like an awesome mom and other times I think my children deserve better.
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed, exhausted, angry and bitter while other times I feel elated, fulfilled, thankful and content. Thankfully, on the whole I am incredibly satisfied with my life and the craziness that is my normal.
