Saturday, August 7, 2010

Promises of things to come.......

There is something about a garden that invokes anticipation and excitement. I remember how thrilled I was when I saw our first few seedlings push through the soft earth and stretch toward the light. It is interesting that in order for a seed to germinate, it has to first die. This evening, I was delighted to discover hundreds of tiny promises of things to come on my tomato plants. Within another month or so I will be feasting on cherry tomatoes (LOVE LOVE LOVE cherry tomatoes). There was a time when we didn't think our tomato plants would survive and now they are bursting with life.

In some ways, I am feeling a little like a seed these days. Motherhood is teaching me..... or rather forcing me to die to myself on a regular basis. Nearly every hour I have to give up something I would rather do, to help my child grow. The past few weeks have been particularly challenging. My dear sweet Amelia has decided to start waking up throughout the night again and it has left me feeling wasted. I tried to take a little nap on the couch only to be rudely awakened when a jar of spaghetti sauce was dropped on my head. I laugh about it now, but at the moment I felt furious! Fortunately I was able to catch up on my sleep a little later when I put her down for her afternoon nap. Two and half hours later(Hurray for long naps) I woke up a new woman! I opened the curtains and felt the sun on my face. All was well in the world again.

Sometimes, when I am in the midst of something, say sleep deprivation or dealing with a whinny toddler, it feels like my world is mired in misery, but I often forget that those moments don't last forever and each day is filled with tiny promises of things to come.

We are still on evacuation notice but I have hope that patches of blue sky mean that we are not under immediate threat of loosing our home and belongings.

1 comment:

Rachel said...

yes jocelyn, there are times when i feel just the same as you, when you want to do things and when your having a challenging time with your toddler. i have grown alot in a good way since i have had him though. It has matured me greatly and i am thankful for that. I love samuel very much.